bismillah.. so it’s nearly been a month I’ve been working at Papar.

how busy the work depends on the task that i’ve been assigned. most busy days are usually whenever i’m sent to treat outpatients and highschool children. sometimes it’s half busy, some other times there’s nothing to do AT ALL..

i hate feeling bored at those no-patients days! i have tried several things to avoid feeling bored too much; like chatting with the clinic staffs. but then i dislike this activity, because it made me bored much more. for days i’ve been reading at these ‘leasure’ times. it worked but sometimes i got sleepy.

adding to the boredom, I’m no good at communicating with the staffs, there’s no real friends. not that i’m feeling lonely (i’m used to being alone and i like it) but there’s a sense of awkwardness when there’s nothing to do….

next week i’ll be giving a talk to secondary school students. of course it’s about oral healthcare and i have to provide slides. and next month i’ll be presenting a case study to the staffs, including other dental officers there.

but how damn, i hate attention. i hate standing in front. i want to hide. i want to be…. unknown. please.

life’s funny.

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